Dear Mr Kraft and Coach Belichick,
The past two years I have traveled to Miami to watch you play the Dolphins. Both years the Patriots were clearly the better team but both years New England lost. I am not taking responsibility for the losses but I am saying intelligent men like the three of us do not believe in coincidences.
What I propose to you is simple and straightforward - you pay me $10,000 to stay home and not go to next year's game in Miami. This is a pittance to pay for an insurance policy. If you do not pay and if I go to next year's game and once again you lose - my price will go up to $20,0000.
Please consider the offer.
Chris "Mush" Lynch