Monday, October 06, 2025

Jokes from the Week in News

Have to look at the humorous side of the news - else you might go crazy.

  • Where have you gone Quentin Ewers - a Longhorns nation turns their lonely eyes to you. Woo woo woo
  • Before the season when Penn State fans were saying “This is the year!” - I don’t think this is what they meant
  • Am I a bad person for liking calling the government shutdown the “Schumer siesta” and the Democrats “Dollar Tree Obamas?”
  • If they do expand March Madness to a 76-team field that just means that’s another day I won’t be watching. I already skip the “play in games.” Where will they put the extra games - the Home Shopping Network?
  • YouTube has settled a suit brought by Donald Trump for $24.5 million. It would be amusing if Trump took this money as well as the millions from CBS, ABC, and others and invested it in Tesla. Imagine how many heads would explode
  • It’s quiet out there - too quiet. Oh wait - that’s just because there’s a government shutdown
  • AOC costs her Congressional District 250,000 jobs with Amazon - Chuck Schumer says “Hold my beer”
  • Des Moines illegal alien superintendent registered to vote in Maryland and Adam Schiff lists Maryland as his principal residence - coincidence or crime wave?
  • A Des Moines school superintendent was arrested by ICE and I didn’t know whether to say he was doing a job Americans wouldn’t do or if he was the ultimate DEI hire
  • If I’m Amy Cohen Barrett I’d totally wear a handmaiden’s tale outfit for Halloween. Or, conversely, you could also wear a handmaiden’s tale outfit and go as Amy Cohen Barrett
  • It was pointed out that Charlie Kirk was shot on a school campus so all the educators celebrating his death are actually cheering for a school shooter. Now I can’t get that thought out of my head
  • Would be kind of funny if the Obama “foundation” defaulted on their deal to build the Obama Presidential Library on a 19.3 acre part of a Chicago park and stuck the city with the costs. Thanks Obama!

Jokes from the past week's news offerings. At least they were funny to me.  

No comments:

Post a Comment