Kaz's Anal Fissure

Bad news for Astros fans:

Astros second baseman Kaz Matsui is expected to miss four or five days after being diagnosed with a condition known as anal fissure.

An anal fissure is not something I would wish on my worst enemy. Not even Jay S. you prick! (Sorry I take that back - Jay S. deserves eternal anal fissures.)

I must admit that as soon as I hear the words "anal fissure" - I thought of this.