Confession

This morning's confession is prompted by this post Heights: fear of falling or urge to leap plus a recent conversation with friends.

Let's start with the recent conversation.

Last Saturday I was playing cards with some friends at a bar. I had just returned from a trip to the Grand Canyon and talk turned to the recent people who had died from falling/jumping into the canyon.

I said that I wasn't surprised because some people get the sudden urge to jump just from being so close to the edge. I admitted that I know because I'm one of those people. There were four of us and two of my friends looked at me like I was crazy. "Why would you think like that?" they wanted to know. Before I could answer my friend Brian admitted, "Yeah I'm the same way."

Neither one of us is suicidal but if you put us too close to the edge we think of jumping. Neither one of us suffer from anxiety as that post I linked to would have you believe. Brian has a great life and I'm about as relaxed a person as you'd be likely to meet. Yet both of us feel the urge to leap. Always have.

I remember reading that Winston Churchill admitted that he didn't trust himself on the top decks of navy destroyers and other ships because he'd often get the urge to jump into the sea. I also get that same feeling sometimes when I'm on the top deck of a ferry or cruise ship. (And yes I did just compare myself to Winston Churchill.)

There's probably a reason people like Brian, Winston and myself get these urges to leap but the answer isn't close to what is suggested in the post I linked to. 

Confession

I grew up Catholic and I have to confess that most of my time at mass was spent reviewing the Boston Red Sox roster in my head. First I would try to recall each player on the 25 and 40-man rosters. Then I would start thinking about if certain players at Pawtucket would be upgrades. This would get me to about the time the priest was giving his homily. At that point I was most likely starting to go through next year's free agent class and wondering which of those players would be a good fit in Boston.

When it was time for communion - I would stop thinking about the Red Sox roster and start thinking about which women in the receiving line I would like to have sex with (but that is a different confession).

I am thinking about starting to attend church again. I think it might help with my fantasy baseball skills.