Tuesday, January 18, 2022

Stop Kenneth Branagh Before He Kills Again

Kenneth Branagh has a new movie Death on the Nile coming out where he reprises his role as "world famous detective" Hercule Poirot. I will not be seeing this movie as I rate his 2017 remake of Murder on the Orient Express as THE worst movie I ever bought a ticket to. How bad was it? This is what I wrote after seeing it:

So last night I finally saw Murder on the Orient Express and it was awful! How awful? This was an actual conversation with my girlfriend:

Me: This movie is awful compared to the original.
Her: This movie is awful compared to anything.

Your taste in movies may differ.

6 comments:

  1. You are right about the 2017 remake - it was beyond terrible. I can only assume they will ruin this movie as well so I won't be seeing it either.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Puzzled by the fact that piece of crap movie still has a 6.5 rating on IMDB. The people who liked that movie must not have seen any other movies in their lives to compare it to.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I actually really liked the movie. but I thought the book was hackneyed (altho, to be fair, Christie likely created the trope) so I wasn't expecting much, and mostly sat there with hearts in my eyes for the train shots...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Granted the train shots were cool - but this movie compared to the original was night and day

    ReplyDelete
  5. also, why do people complain about Tiny Tom Cruise playing Big Jack Reacher, but not Big Kenneth Branaugh playing Tiny Hercule Poirot?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Think two reasons for that:

    1. There are more Jack Reacher book readers today than Agatha Christie readers - thus more people are upset at what they pictured when reading versus the size of Tom Cruise.
    2. Albert Finney did such a good job in the original Murder on the Orient Express that any outrage about the size of the actor fizzled. Besides Kenneth Branagh's not exactly a short man either

    ReplyDelete