Inappropriate Lap Dance Songs

A reader in Bill Simmons latest Internet chat wrote:

Adam: (New York, NY): You are exactly the guy to settle this: For the first time in my life this past weekend I was fortunate enough have "Mr. Roboto" as the background song for a lap dance. Needless to say, it was a wastershed comedic moment in my life. Watching a stripper try to put together a dance that was both alluring and contextually appropriate given the song was more entertaining than watching Eric Dickerson try to ad-lib an analysis of Lyndon Johnson's "Great Society." Anyway, the question: Is "Mr. Roboto" the funniest possible strip-club song to provoke this absolutely riveting experience?

Bill Simmons suggested maybe Starship's We Built this City or Billy Joel's We Didn't Start the Fire. His readers chimed in with the following suggestions:

- TNT by AC/DC
- 500 Miles by the Proclaimers
- Everybody Hurts by REM
- Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give You Up
- Mike and the Mechanics The Living Years
- Disco Duck by Rick Dees

My mind works differently but I would suggest the following (just for comedy's sake):

- Ballad of the Green Berets by Staff Sgt. Barry Sadler
- Love Child by Dianna Ross
- Thank You for Being a Friend (either the Andrew Gold version or the Theme to Golden Girls version)
- Kate Smith singing God Bless America
- In the Ghetto by Elvis
- YMCA by the Village People