No Way to Run a Campaign

Below please find a timeline of how the Kerry campaign has been run since August 1st. This is just three months but I think the incompetence, deceit and meanspiritedness exhibited show why John Kerry should not be trusted to run the country for four years.

Aug. 1 - Normally a candidate gets a "bounce" in the polls immediately after his convention - not so for Kerry.

Aug. 2 - Kerry advisor says Kerry will make world safer by giving Iran nuclear fuel and hope that they use it for good. Sane people everywhere say, "Are you friggin' kidding me?" Meanwhile the Kerry campaign suffers some guilt from association after Howard Dean questions the timing of terror alerts in New York - claiming they could be politically motivated. Again, sane people everywhere ask, "Are you friggin' kidding me?"

Aug. 3 - Swift Boat Veterans for Truth explain their version of the real story of John Kerry's military history - this picture was interesting

Aug. 4 - The Kerry campaign and DNC lawyers threaten legal action against any stations that air the Swift Boat ads. Instead of addressing the allegations made by the vets - Kerry decides that threat of legal action would be better. The campaign slogan is officially amended to "Bring it on.....and we'll sue!" Meanwhile Senator Kerry announces:

I believe I can fight a more effective, more thoughtful, more strategic, more proactive, more sensitive war on terror that reaches out to other nations and brings them to our side and lives up to American values in history.

Aug. 5 - Kerry tells reporters that he would not have waited around like Bush did for 7 minutes on 9/11. He states:

"Had I been reading to children and had my top aide whispered in my ear, 'America is under attack,' I would have told those kids very politely and nicely that the president of the United States had something that he needed to attend to -- and I would have attended to it."

This claim comes back to bite him in the ass when his actual reaction to the morning of 9/11 is revealed - over 40 minutes of not being able to think or act.

Aug. 6 - Former New York Mayor - Rudy Giuliani notes that it is sad that a man running for the president seems to be getting his clues from Michael Moore and Rudy adds for good measure:

John Kerry is an indecisive candidate [with] an inconsistent position on the War on Terror, who voted against funding for our troops and who cannot give a clear answer on his position concerning the decision to remove Saddam Hussein

On the Swift Boat front - the now controversial Michael Kranish pens a piece for the Boston Globe that claims that George Elliot has recanted his criticism of John Kerry. George Elliot responds under oath saying "I said no such things."

Aug. 7 - Kerry's wife Theresa contradicts Kerry's claim that the President did not act properly on the morning of 9/11 by saying:

"I think the president behaved correctly in terms of being quiet amidst stunning news like that in a classroom of kids," she told the host of MSNBC's "Hardball With Chris Matthews" during an interview before the Democratic National Convention last month. "You know, what can you do? It takes you a couple of minutes to digest what you have just heard. And then he was . . . not in his White House and in his office with all of his people. He was in the school in Florida."

Aug. 8 - At the DNC Theresa Heinz-Kerry claimed to be active in anti-Apartheid protests but evidence suggests that she attended just a single protest.

Aug. 9 - A Rueters article notes that; "Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry said on Monday he would have voted for the congressional resolution authorizing force against Iraq even if he had known then no weapons of mass destruction would be found." This goes over well with the Deaniac base.

Aug. 10 - The Mary Ann Knowles story about having to work through chemotherapy that Kerry used at the DNC turns out to be untrue.

Aug. 11 - The Kerry Campaign changes its story on Christmas in Cambodia. I don't think "seared into my memory" means what I think he thinks it means.

Aug. 12 - Quiet day for the Kerry Campaign. Whoever was in charge today should get a promotion.

Aug. 13 - Grumbling from the Kerry Press Corps. Oh and an article by Kathleen Antrim in the ultra liberal San Francisco Examiner leads with, "John F. Kerry's campaign for president is imploding. And he knows it."

Aug. 14 - Dave Kopel examines media bias on the Swift Boat Veterans issue. The Kerry Campaign takes another guilt by association hit when Senator Tom Harkin calls VP Dick Cheney a "coward" for not serving in Vietnam. It is quickly pointed out that Harkin has lied about his service (actually lack of service) in Vietnam in the past. Harkin is supposed to be an integral part of the campaign but is now nowhere to be found.

Aug. 15 - The Christmas in Cambodia claims are examined in of all places - The Seattle Times

Aug. 16 - It is noted that the Kerry / Edwards Campaign site touts that "Kerry is an Experienced Leader in the Intelligence Field - John Kerry served on the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence is the former Vice Chairman of the Committee" - the problem is that was actually Bob Kerrey. John Kerry was never Vice Chairman (maybe there was an attendance requirement?). The claim was later removed from the site but it is strange that Kerry doesn't even seem to know his own resume.

Reports that David Alston never served with Kerry on a Swift Boat turn out to be false but the truth is that it is likely that Alston only served a week with Kerry. Alston is quietly dropped by the Kerry campaign. Bonus - Christmas in Cambodia gets coverage in the Wall Street Journal.

Aug. 17 - FactCheck.org researches a Bush ad claim that Kerry missed 76% of the meetings for the Senate Intelligence Committee (a committee on which Kerry sat and something on his resume that he touts as reason to vote for him). After checking the available data - FactCheck.org says that the amount of meetings missed or skipped by Kerry was probably higher than 76%. Kerry refuses to release records on his attendance at "closed" meetings

Aug. 18 - Swift Boat vets respond to a counter ad by MoveOn PAC

"We find it odd that MoveOn PAC would question the right of a group of veterans to voice an opinion on a legitimate issue-an issue first raised by John Kerry-and now the centerpiece of his campaign," said Rear Admiral Roy Hoffmann, U.S. Navy (Ret.), founder and chairman of Swift Boat Veterans for Truth (www.swiftvets.com). "The 300-plus veterans who make up the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth have every right to participate in a public debate concerning the controversy surrounding John Kerry's military service record. We were there. We served alongside John Kerry and we know the history of his service. We will not be silenced."

Kerry receives a less than overwhelming reception from the VFW National Convention in Cincinnati. At the same event Kerry criticized the President's announcement of troop redeployment out of Europe and Korea. The fact is that just two weeks earlier Kerry was quoted as wanting to reduce the number of troops in Korea himself. After the flip-flop is pointed out - troop redeployment is dropped as a campaign talking point.

Aug. 19 - Veterans from the USS Gridley (who served with Kerry on his first tour of Vietnam) come forward as not real enamored of the Senator and the words "just another goofy Ensign" enter the national consciousness.

Aug. 20 - A second ad from Swift Boat Veterans for Truth is released. This ad deals with Kerry's testimony in front of Congress in which he alleges war crimes were rampant in Vietnam. The Veterans in the ad are none too happy with Kerry.

Aug. 21 - The Washington Post profiles William Ferris (who was severely wounded in action and who watched John Kerry's 1971 Senate testimony about war crimes from his hospital bed) and other Swift Boat veterans. The article reminds the reader that Kerry has not released his medical or military records.

Aug. 22 - Bob Dole says something that probably many were thinking:

"One day he's saying that we were shooting civilians, cutting off their ears, cutting off their heads, throwing away his medals or his ribbons," Dole said. "The next day he's standing there, 'I want to be president because I'm a Vietnam veteran.

"Maybe he should apologize to all the other 2.5 million veterans who served. He wasn't the only one in Vietnam," said Dole, whose World War II wounds left him without the use of his right arm.

Dole added: "And here's, you know, a good guy, a good friend. I respect his record. But three Purple Hearts and never bled that I know of. I mean, they're all superficial wounds. Three Purple Hearts and you're out."

Aug. 23 - Kerry Campaign "alleges" illegal connection between Bush Campaign and Swift Boat Vets for Truth but ignores the fact that proof of illegal contact between Kerry Campaign and 527 MoveOn.org is literally hosted on their Campaign Website.

Aug. 24 - The Kerry Campaign backpedals on Kerry's first Purple Heart - quote from Fox News' Major Garrett:

GARRETT: And questions keep coming. For example, Kerry received a Purple Heart for wounds suffered on December 2nd, 1968. But an entry in Kerry's own journal written nine days later, he writes that, quote, he and his crew hadn't been shot at yet, unquote. Kerry's campaign has said it is possible his first Purple Heart was awarded for an unintentionally self-inflicted wound.

John Kerry comes out of his media semi-seclusion to appear on Comedy Channel's Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Kerry manages a "Daily" double of both alienating the main stream media by appearing on the Comedy Channel instead of say - NBC, ABC or CBS while at the same time appearing less Presidential than host Jon Stewart. Even the normally "Kerry friendly" Slate rips into the appearance:

Kerry's charisma was less than zero: It was negative. He was a charm vacuum, forced to actually borrow mojo from audience members. He was a dessicated husk, a tin man who really didn't have a heart. His lack of vibrancy, his utter dearth of sex appeal made Al Gore look like Charo. . . .

Aug. 25th - Kerry sends triple amputee Max Cleland to Bush's Texas ranch to demand the President denounce the swift Boat Veteran ads. The event seems staged (and is even reportedly filmed by Michael Moore) and reminds people of a quote from Kerry from back in 1971.

"I called the media. . . . I said, 'If I take some crippled veterans down to the White House and we chain ourselves to the gates, will we get coverage?' 'Oh, yes, we will cover that.' "--John Kerry, testimony before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, April 22, 1971

The "stunt" may have double back-fired when the Bush Campaign presents their own letter which reads in part:

We’re proud of our service in Vietnam. We served honorably in Vietnam and we were deeply hurt and offended by your comments when you came home.

You can’t have it both ways. You can’t build your convention and much of your campaign around your service in Vietnam, and then try to say that only those veterans who agree with you have a right to speak up. There is no double standard for our right to free speech. We all earned it.

The letter is signed by by among others - two Congressional Medal of Honor recipients.

Aug. 26th - This ranks up there with Kerry's "Manny Ortiz" quote about the Red Sox:

As he [Kerry] was taking questions from the audience, he referred to the legendary Packers stadium, Lambeau Field (which has been called that for 39 years) as "Lambert Field."

Aug. 27th - The story of Kerry's first Purple Heart becomes murkier. And murkier. The Campaign strategy was to use Kerry's military experience to bolster his standing as Commander in Chief but what it has done is greatly undermine his credibility.

Aug. 28th - Earlier Kerry had told a mostly Cuban crowd in Florida that he voted for the get tough on Castro Helms-Burton Act. But when fact checked - it turns out that Kerry voted against Helms-Burton (only one of 22 nays). The Kerry campaign tried to explain the "discrepancy":

Asked Friday to explain the discrepancy, Kerry aides said the senator cast one of the 22 nays that day in 1996 because he disagreed with some of the final technical aspects. But, said spokesman David Wade, Kerry supported the legislation in its purer form -- and voted for it months earlier.

I really don't think they understand that "I voted for it before I voted against it" has already become a national joke. Plus more questions on the Silver Star. Oh - and even more questions on Kerry's Silver Star. The also Kerry campaign allows itself to fall victim of a prank (my personal favorite)

Aug. 29th - The Kerry campaign is going so poorly - even the Kerry girls get booed.

Aug. 30th - It seems like even the Democratic consultants realize that Kerry's message of "things are bad and have to change" isn't selling.

Aug. 31st - It seems like the Kerry campaign finally acknowledges what has been obvious to most everyone else for a long time and changes in the campaign staffing are in the works.

Sept. 1st - After an awful August - a furious Kerry orders a shakeup of his campaign leadership. Meanwhile - the San Francisco Chronicle lauds the GOP as the party of inclusiveness? That can't be welcome news for the Kerry campaign. At the RNC the Democrats get hell from one of their own - Zell Miller:

What has happened to the party I've spent my life working in? I can remember when Democrats believed that it was the duty of America to fight for freedom over tyranny. It was Democratic President Harry Truman who pushed the Red Army out of Iran, who came to the aid of Greece when Communists threatened to overthrow it, who stared down the Soviet blockade of West Berlin by flying in supplies and saving the city. Time after time in our history, in the face of great danger, Democrats and Republicans worked together to ensure that freedom would not falter. Motivated more by partisan politics than by national security, today's Democratic leaders see America as an occupier, not a liberator. And nothing makes this Marine madder than someone calling American troops occupiers rather than liberators.

Sept. 2nd - Another luke-warm reception for Kerry by a veteran's group - this time from the American Legion in Tennessee. Kerry also completely breaks with the age-old gentleman's agreement of not campaigning during the opposition's convention to deliver a midnight speech in Springfield, Ohio in response to the Bush acceptance speech. The Kerry speech does not go over well with - well anyone.

Sept. 3rd - The Kerry campaign has to settle for Joe-mentum as all the "momentum" goes to President Bush.

"The Democrats are eviscerated," says Jay H. Leve, Editor of SurveyUSA. "Even in the most solidly Democratic corners of this country, a majority of adults suddenly believe that George W. Bush will win in November."

Time Magazine backs up this survey with a poll of their own that shows Bush leading by 11 points. Kerry's Ace in the hole - Bill Clinton is suddenly unavailable as it becomes necessary for him to have emergency bypass surgery. Meanwhile Ralph Nader gets on the ballot in Michigan despite Kerry's and the DNC's best efforts.

Sept. 4th - The town of Steubenville, Ohio gives Kerry the cold shoulder. Doesn't this campaign have any advance people who can sniff out problems like this? Meanwhile Newsweek also shows Bush with an 11 point lead over Kerry.

Sept. 5th - The Kerry campaign can stonewall the Swiftboat Vets but I'm pretty sure that they'll have to answer the questions from the Inspector General of the Navy regarding false claims. The Kerry campaign posts what they call "lies, mischaracterizations, distortions, and half-truths" from the four days of RNC. (NOTE: the original page on the Kerry website is "disappeared" like Soviet airbrushing of history but Charles at LGF kept a copy - God bless Charles.) Reading through the list leaves you scratching your head thinking WTF? For example - is the Kerry campaign agreeing with this or disputing it? It's hard to tell:

John Kerry Has No Clear, Consistent Vision of Terrorism.

35. Rudy Giuliani: President Bush sees world terrorism for the evil that it is. John Kerry has no such clear, precise and consistent vision.

Sept. 6th - Kerry gets advice from Bill "Ace in the hole" Clinton and a further shakeup of campaign staffing seems immanent. In a Pennsylvania campaign stop John Kerry clearly veers into Howard Dean territory stating that he would want to bring the troops in Iraq home within 4 years (his first term). In addition:

Faulting Bush on almost every aspect of his move toward war, Kerry said the United States is carrying the burden in casualties and cost. He called the president's coalition ''the phoniest thing I ever heard.''

To date 131 non-US colalition soldiers have lost their lives in Iraq. I am sure the leaders of England, Australia, Portugal and Italy among others are just thrilled with Kerry's latest slur.

Sept. 7th - Kerry's attempt to appear as a regular guy backfires when it is reported that the shotgun he accepted as a gift is among the guns he cosponsored a bill to ban. Kerry's "wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time" sounds like something Howard Dean would say and something that Kerry would have attacked Dean for saying. The name Steve Pitkin surfaces - keep this in mind for future reference because I think you may be hearing more about him later in the campaign (especially if the Kerry campaign tries something stupid like trying to pass off forged documents about Bush's guard service).

Sept. 8th - Kerry loses the endorsement from both the VFW and the American Legion to President Bush. This is normally not that big a deal but Kerry made his status as a veteran of a foreign war a cornerstone of his campaign. Meanwhile even media outlets who favor Kerry are having trouble figuring out who's in charge of the campaign. Could it be that nobody wants the "credit" for this disaster of a campaign?

Sept. 9th - The much anticipated Washington Post / ABC poll numbers are released and it is pretty much all bad news for the Kerry campaign. Major collateral damage to the Kerry campaign is suffered when FOK-er (Friend of Kerry) Dan Rather uses documents to smear President Bush that are almost immediately widely denounced as forgeries.

Sept. 10th - Speculation that the forged documents are tied to the DNC. CBS not releasing its sources will only further the idea that this is true. Meanwhile - it has been 41 days since John Kerry last allowed himself to be questioned in an interview. Maybe the idea is to never allow the candidate to answer any more questions until election day?

Sept 11th - Kerry uses a solemn day of remembrance to play the race card.

Sept. 12th - The Kerry campaign's collateral damage from the 60 Minutes fraud continues.

Sept. 13th - Zell "I will never trust John Kerry with my family's safety" Miller keeps firing away and damaging the Kerry campaign among NRA Democrats. John Kerry tries to get his message out but nobody is listening because all the attention is on Dan Rather and his dubious documents.

Sept. 14th - Kerry continues to trail in the major swing states. The DNC ties itself to Dan Rather in a big way. Republicans ask "is this the best they got?"

Sept. 15th - Things are so bad for the Kerry campaign that both New Jersey and Illinois are now in play. First Jon Stewart and now Don Imus. At least Kerry is heading in the right direction. At this pace he won't do Tim Russet's show until November 6th (which of course will be too late).

Sept. 16th - Possibly the low point for the Kerry campaign. I must say that the tenor of the campaign is set at the top and with Kerry on the attack, attack, attack with no substance - this particular attack may come to symbolize the campaign without dignity. I'm just glad that the Union leadership acted in an adult fashion. The Kerry Campaign suffers collateral damage as MoveOn.org comes out with an ad showing a defeated American soldier in Iraq. The ad is immediately attacked by people like Bob Dole who calls for John Kerry to condemn the ad. Does MoveOn.org really think they are aiding John Kerry's chances with ads like this?

Sept. 17th - CBS's new poll shows Bush ahead by 9 points - but people are now taking anything from CBS with a grain of salt.

Sept. 18th - John Kerry thinks that President Bush is reaching into the Richard Nixon playbook of secret plans to end the war. This time Kerry alleges that Bush will call up even more National Guardsmen after the election. Meanwhile Kerry's sister chips in with her $.02 - telling Australians that siding with the US has only served to make them targets.

Sept. 19th - Football Fans for truth come out against Kerry. The 2004 campaign for President in a nutshell - Dick Cheney visits Green Bay and campaigns with Packer legend Bart Starr meanwhile Kerry campaigns in Green Bay and calls Lambeau Field "Lambert Field." The Kerry campaign drops the ball yet again.

Sept. 20th - Will future historians blame Dan Rather for killing the Kerry Campaign? Will future historians decide that the Kerry Campaign was an active participant in the fraud? Real reporters don't have the opportunity to ask Kerry about any connections because Kerry only does softball shows like The Daily Show and The Late Show with David Letterman.

Sept. 21st - It's gotten so bad that even Michael Moore is basically calling Kerry a loser.

Sept. 22nd - Kerry tries to pass off the idea that if Bush is re-elected then Bush will bring back the draft. Kerry also faces some reality and concedes Arizona, Arkansas, Louisiana and the birthplace of Harry Truman - Missouri. The Kerry campaign concedes those states by pulling all their advertising. Wisconsin may be next on the list. Lambert Field indeed!

Sept. 23rd - The Kerry campaign calls Iraqi Prime Minister Ayad Allawi a liar and a puppet. People keep waiting for today's version of Joseph Welch to ask him, "Have you no sense of decency, sir, at long last?" Instead we get "Oh who cares!"

Sept. 24th - John Kerry praises the UN and criticizes the US and our allies. Foreign policy and building bridges was supposed to be a Kerry strength. I've been doing a daily timeline of the Kerry campaign and I'm having trouble deciding when it passed from a joke to a disgrace.

Sept. 25th - Public backlash about biased media coverage via RatherGate, polls that show almost no hope for Kerry, disappointment in how the candidate attacked the Prime Minister of Iraq who simply came to this country to say thank you, a feeling that less than 2 months till the election nobody yet knows where the candidate stands on the issues - all these things pervade the Kerry campaign but no one new example stands out. So no link for today.

Sept. 26th - With nothing else working - Kerry blasts Bush for saying Mission Accomplished - the only problem being Bush never said Mission Accomplished. Meanwhile Joe Biden has to do a clean up in aisle Kerry over Kerry's earlier slamming of Iraqi Prime Minister Ayad Allawi.

Sept. 27th - As Homer Simpson would say - it's funny because its true - "He [Kerry] probably could spend 90 minutes debating himself. It's been a little difficult to prepare because he keeps changing positions on the war on terror." Meanwhile the Democrats demonstrate the difference between humor and political scare tactics by sending out Ted "The war in Iraq has made the mushroom cloud more likely, not less likely" Kennedy

Sept. 28th - Tan in a can? Oompa-Lumpa-Gate? Issues take a backseat today while the nation describes Kerry's sudden change in appearance. Personally I think it makes him look like this.

Sept. 29th - CBS News hits bottom and digs with a story about possible re-instatement of the draft. The urban legend has been debunked many times but that doesn't keep CBS from running a very sloppy piece of journalism. It also leads to re-examination of a John Kerry proposal for mandatory government service.

Sept. 30th - John Kerry finally has something go good for him as he performs very well in the first Presidential debate. Unfortunately - it seems to be too little too late. The phrase "Global Test" is sure to make all the Republican talking points from here on in too.

Oct. 1st - Terry MacAuliffe's email spam campaign may have sounded like a good idea at the time but in hindsight no so much.

Oct. 2nd - If I was in charge of the Kerry campaign - the first thing I would do is ban any footballs from getting within 100 yards of the candidate. In addition to footballs - I would also try to keep Theresa out of the public eye as well - it seems like the real managers may have the same idea.

Oct. 3rd - The Lowell Sun (of Massachusetts) endorses President Bush. Kerry still has the Boston Globe in his back pocket though. "Global Test" is turning into this year's "where's the beef" punchline. Oh and about that nuclear fuel for Iran - the mullahs (or in Bush-speak "Moo-lahs") say no thanks.

Oct. 4th - The Kerry campaign's plans to keep Theresa under wraps go awry. Theresa claims that the Taliban is back in power in Afghanistan and that Iraq was a simple matter of "blood for oil".

Oct. 5th - Cheney and Edwards square off at the VP debate. We want Cheney on that wall. We need Cheney on that wall. John Edwards, "Do I seem soft to you?" Babs from Animal House, "Honey is it supposed to be this soft?" Oh and just for good measure:

In 2002, John Edwards told CNN’s Late Edition:

“I think Iraq is the most serious and imminent threat to our country. And I think Iraq and Saddam Hussein present the most serious and most imminent threat.”

His story has seemed to have flip-flopped.

Oct. 6th - Kerry takes the day off and admits that there's no way France or Germany will be sending troops to Iraq even if Kerry is elected. Both things are good news for the Kerry campaign because most Americans really don't want French or German soldiers in Iraq (we are already busy training the Iraqi soldiers and we don't have time to train others) and Kerry's numbers go up whenever he's out of the public's sight. On another front - the House overwhelmingly votes down Rangel's (D-NY) Draft proposal - hopefully this puts to bed the rumors / smears of a secret draft plan.

Oct. 7th - Kerry's foreign policy plan falling apart. Kerry's plan for mandatory service for high school age students is "disappeared" from the Kerry website coincidently just before the second debate and right after a proposal to reinstate the draft is soundly defeated in the House. When John Kerry says he has a plan and that it is on his web site - check it quick before the campaign deletes it (thank heaven for web archiving).

Oct. 8th - The second debate is viewed as either a draw or a Bush win by most commentators (I had it as a Bush win)

Oct. 9th - ABC tries to give Kerry an assist but instead just joins CBS among those not to be trusted to tell the truth. Rassmussen puts Bush at 50% - not good news for the Kerry campaign.

Oct. 10th - The elections in Afghanistan go smoothly with the first voter being a 19-year old woman. Good news for the United States - bad news for the Kerry campaign. This is probably why Kerry stopped doing interviews: In an interview with the NY Times Kerry calls terrorism a nuisance and compares it to gambling and prostitution. A nuisance? Are you friggin' kidding me?

Oct. 11th - The "nuisance" comment has legs and Rudy Giuliani hammers Kerry for not understanding the threat of terrorism.Meanwhile, after a rash of office break-ins and a seemingly co-ordinated strategy of intimidation and disruption - the Bush Cheney Campaign complains to the AFL-CIO. The public image of union members has certainly taken a big hit in this campaign. Busy day, General Tommy Franks (who was in charge of both the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq) sums up Kerry thusly:

“If his voting record ruled the day, Saddam Hussein would not only be running Iraq but Kuwait,” Franks told about 200 people Sunday at a Reno rally.

Oct. 12th - Sinclair Broadcasting decides to run the documentary Stolen Honor. The DNC threatens to sue to stop the broadcast. The Kerry campaign just threatens:

Kerry Senior Advisor Chad Clanton to SINCLAIR Broadcasting: 'They better hope we don't win' [said on FOX NEWS DAYSIDE]..

Oct. 13th - Unfortunately for Kerry - the only thing that people will remember from the third Presidential debate is the fact that he tried to use Dick Cheney's daughter for political gain. Whatever campaign advisor suggested that as a strategy should be fired on the spot.

Oct. 14th - What does Dick Cheney think of John Kerry using Cheney's daughter as a campaign prop?

You saw a man who will say and do anything in order to get elected. And I am not speaking just as a father here, though I am a pretty angry father, but as a citizen.

Oct. 15th - Kerry continues to use the myth of a draft on the campaign trail. Maybe Kerry wants a draft because the volunteer armed forces overwhelming don't like him? Meanwhile Teresa uses a home remedy (i.e. gin and white raisins) to deal with the aches and pains of the campaign trail. Teresa's snake oil is probably better than what Edwards and Kerry are offering - at least in the eyes of Charles Krauthammer.

Oct. 16th - Cops who want nothing to do with Kerry:

"As the elected leader of the largest organization representing America's Federal, State and local law enforcement officers, I believe it's important to point out yet again that we do not support his candidacy for President," [Fraternal Order of Police President Chuck] Canterbury said. "And to be perfectly frank, the groups which do support him actually share the same membership rolls and, taken together, probably comprise less than one-quarter of our nation's police officers."

Remember Kerry claiming 56 pieces of legislation during the debate? (In my best Maxwell Smart voice) "Would you believe 11? How about 5?"

Oct. 17th - Gallup poll has Bush up by touchdown and two point conversion.

Oct. 18th - Terrorist Yasser Arafat endorses Kerry. The Kerry campaign tries to deflect the news with more silly sports photo ops. Meanwhile, the idea to mention Mary Cheney was not a good one. The Kerry campaign heads to its logical conclusion.

Oct. 19th - The Kerry campaign will have to deal with a very emotional commercial on behalf of President Bush. The Ashey ad debuts today. Meanwhile Kerry speaks French on the campaign trail (maybe he was telling people that he served in Vietnam in a different language just for a change?). Kerry also has to deal with General Tommy Franks taking the hammer to him in a frank comparison between Bush and Kerry.

Oct. 20th - Hmmm...another relatively quiet day. Is there irony in the fact that Kerry spent this relatively quiet day in Waterloo, IA?

Oct. 21st - The "youth" vote chooses Bush by a 55% to 40% margin. A Kerry aid is rumored to respond "Don't they know that Bush has a secret plan to draft them?" Meanwhile Al Gore goes on the stump for Kerry in Florida (and Oliver Stone goes on record as saying this is a Karl Rove conspiracy by the Republicans aimed at annoying independent voters).

Oct. 22nd - The new Bush ad "Wolves" debuts today. The Kerry campaign says they will counter with their own animal ad - one showing an ostrich with his head in the sand and a soaring eagle. Problem is - most people associate Kerry with the ostrich.

Oct. 23rd - The election in a nutshell - Kerry thinks of Osama bin Laden as the world's "number one criminal" while Bush thinks of him as vermin to be exterminated.

Oct. 24th - The New York Times reports that Bush has a higher IQ then Kerry. Questions abound in regard to who is to blame for the failure to get out the "over the hill Diva" and "lesbian talk-show host" vote. Rosie blames Tom Selleck and the NRA. Maybe the October surprise is that Democratic Hawaii is in play?

Oct. 25th - Ouch! This has to hurt Kerry in Wisconsin. Meanwhile Elizabeth Edwards promises / threatens "no riots if we win". In related news - John Edwards sues all you can eat buffet on behalf of wife (sorry cheap shot - I know - but my road to hell is already paved). Oh and those members of the UN Security Council that Kerry claimed to have met with - seems like that meeting most likely occurred in Kerry's Swift boat in Cambodia maybe even over Christmas vacation. Meanwhile Kerry hammers Bush over "disappearance" of explosives from a place that is phonetically called AL - Caa - Caa (later revealed that US Army removed and destroyed munitions - oops Kerry's bad!).

Oct. 26th - Bad news for Kerry - will he be terminated in Ohio on Friday? More bad news from Hollywood - and the rumor surfaces that Kerry /Edwards enjoy gladiator movies.

Oct. 27th - Won't you think of the children! (As free get out the vote labor.)

Oct. 28th - Ouch - the German paper BILD (the largest paper in Europe) endorses Bush - at least Kerry still has the French. Double ouch - the Cape Cod Times also endorses Bush.

Oct. 29th - Is "Wake Up!" the new Kerry campaign slogan? Did it beat out "time for school" or "don't forget to bring a jacket"? Oh and about those munitions at Al Qaqaa - the US Army has them. Meanwhile Osama bin Laden sends election greetings (apparently the words - "I'm John Kerry and I approved this message" were edited out at the last minute).

Oct. 30th - The latest poll numbers are all pretty much bad news for Kerry.

Oct. 31st - John Kerry's stepson Chris Heinze bemoans the "Israel lobby" and call Bush a "cokehead". Yup - the Kerry campaign - all class right till the very end. Jack Welsh - former CEO of GE - has five questions you should ask before casting your vote. The New York Daily News endorses Bush.