Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Much of Scandinavia's original wealth came from Viking raids where the capture and selling of slaves was the big money maker. So according to the rules as I now understand them that means that only racists drive Volvos - right?... Yikes - before Henry VII broke with the Vatican in the 16th century the penalty for eating meat on Friday during Lent in England was hanging... I wonder how many Red Sox fans can trace the signing of Pablo Sandoval as the point their interest in the team and trust in ownership started to dissolve. Maybe it was just coincidental?... They all knew... "Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him." - Aldous Huxley... A decade ago a study from the University of Queensland found that of 187 mammals that had been listed as extinct - 67 were later rediscovered (36% of the whole). Turns out the science was not settled... When did the Democrats change their slogan to "My Party Right or Wrong?"...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Congratulations to the USA Women's Hockey Team on their Gold Medal victory last night over Canada. I could watch the game-winning shootout goal over and over (in fact I have)... I think the crisis of faith in the Catholic Church stems from the fact such a big deal is made over First Communion, But second communion not so much. That's when things start to go off the rails... You might think you've had a cool conversation with a friend but you'll never be as cool as Major John Glenn and Captain Ted Williams discussing flying tactics in Korea cool... If you raped Peter Pan could you be charged with statutory rape? Or could you be charged with elder abuse? How old is Peter Pan? Asking for a friend... Heh heh - no lollipop for you Ray Bourque (I bet Ray is a fantastic grandpa)... Red Sox are paying Pablo Sandoval $18 million not to play in Boston this year. The Yankees are paying Jacoby Ellsbury $21 million each year for the next three years to be a pinch runner. Advantage Boston...  So cool - after last night's game someone changed Maddie Rooney's position from Goalie to US Secretary of Defense...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

So let me get this straight - Obama wanted to take the man who could have prevented the Civil War off the $20 bill?... Heh heh... I swear - George H.W. Bush must have made a sacred oath not to die until Ross Perot kicked the bucket first... Vengeful Farts would be a good name for a punk band or a fantasy football team... Wow - Jim Carey really let himself go... Vodka Monkeys would be a good name for a band... Kiss cam wants you to pretend that's your stepmom... Emojis are turning texting into a modern game of Concentration... While Pablo Sandoval is on the DL - the Red Sox should send his picture to every Dunkin Donuts in Massachusetts with the message "Don't sell this man donuts"... Roger Goodell is a monster... All the whores and politicians look up and shout "save us" and Mitt Romney looks down and whispers "No"... Heh heh...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Just a reminder - "Joe Biden" is an anagram for "I need a job"... I agree with Dan McLaughlin - replacing Andrew Jackson on the $20 is not a bad thing... The Red Sox owe Pablo Sandoval $58 million after this season while the Yankees owe Jacoby Ellsbury $89 million. Advantage Red Sox...  I also agree with this... Still think Two and a Half Men should have replaced Charlie Sheen with Ellen Degeneres and pretended nothing happened. Just like when they switched Darren's on Bewitched... So is there a Plan B if the Olympics can't be held in Rio? Starting to look pretty bad down there... Heh heh - Deadpool knife block... If Alexander Hamilton were alive today - would he be a Yankees fan or a Mets fan?... If life gives you melons - you might be dyslexic...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

I think political debates would be much more interesting if A: only the microphone of the person who is supposed to be speaking is on and B: if they took place inside giant Faraday cages with giant electric bolts being fired when a speaker goes over their allotted time... What a hero looks like... Who knew? They are looking to re-make the movie Death Wish with Bruce Willis playing the Charles Bronson role... I'd vote for Tim Tebow if he was running for Congress in my District... Speaking of politics - I think if the names Frank Castle or Matt Murdock were put on the ballot in the election of New York mayor there's a good chance they'd win. Or maybe I'm still in my Daredevil Season 2 refractory period... Louis CK will definitely make a profit (eventually) off the critically acclaimed Horace and Pete... All New England Dunkin Donuts should be sent a picture of Pablo Sandoval with the instructions "Do not sell this man donuts!"... The Internet was built specifically for things like this... Hairy Toilet would be a good name for a punk band... Robots were developed specifically for tasks like this... Internet fact of the day - Alaska is so big it could fit the State of New Jersey into it 75 times...

Linky Links

Stuff I found interesting or amusing and thought I'd share.

- Fantastic story of how neighbor's made sure their Vet housemate got a proper sendoff

- Wow - making salt water drinkable just got 99% easier. Science kicks ass!

- General James Mattis - thank you for your service!

- I fear that this will end up being Boston's lasting image of Pablo Sandoval

- RIP bunny

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Thinking about changing my name to Sugar Ray Chris Lynch. Just like the idea of people calling me Sugar Ray... I would love to own one of these tree houses... Just a reminder - the New York Yankees practice batting in cold weather by clubbing baby seals... Tough call to decide who had greater Presidential love affair - Harry and Bess Truman or Ron and Nancy Reagan. RIP Nancy... It's stories like this that explain why I want Marco Rubio to be the next President... Seriously I've decided to self-identify as a Sugar Ray. Please respect my Sugar Rayness... I wonder if Ernest Hemingway had CTE from all those years of boxing and drinking?... With Carl Crawford accepting a back-up role with the Dodgers despite his $20 million salary - it makes me wonder if Pablo Sandoval could accept back-up role with Red Sox... When I die I would like my ashes spread over people protesting things I'm in favor of. I also hope it rains that day so that my ashes get extra sticky... Who knew? Bon Scott wasn't even the original lead singer for AC/DC. It was a guy named Dave Evans who Scott replaced after about a year... Happy 63rd birthday to Jim Ed Rice...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

So Hitler may or may not have had a deformed micro penis. If he did have one it would go a long way to explain the intense hatred of a group of people who require cutting off a piece of a male's member to join the club... Heh heh... Generally fat shaming is wrong - but not when it comes to millionaire athletes like Pablo Sandoval... US Navy aircraft carriers are the greatest guarantors of the peace but are they now a liability in war?... I've become addicted to The Great War channel on YouTube...  Heh heh... Hard to believe but video game Legend of Zelda just turned 30 over the weekend... In the Beatles song Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds - I always thought the lyric was "the girl with Colitis goes by" but it actually is "girl with kaleidoscope eyes". My bad... I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THIS HAPPEN!... Just saying but I'd support a law that required male porn actors to wear those fake Groucho nose and glasses. Nobody wants to see their faces... THIS MIGHT BE EVEN MORE FUN TO WATCH! ... There should be a documentary about racism in Hollywood. It could be called Brown and Out in Beverly Hills...

Top 5 - Red Sox Questions

Spring Training is finally here and a boy's thoughts turn to baseball (and sun dresses). Here's my top 5 questions regarding this year's Red Sox team.

1. Hanley Ramirez at 1st base? Do I need to say more? (I'm actually pulling for Hanley.)
2. David Price - will he be the first Boston pitcher with 20-wins since Josh Beckett back in 2007? Has it really been that long since the Red Sox had a 20-game winner?
3. Pablo Sandoval - the Panda is lucky that Hanley Ramirez was more of a hot mess last season otherwise more people would be pissed. He was awful last year and I for one would rather see Travis Shaw get a shot. Now Sandoval wants to get back to switch hitting? He's just trolling us.
4. There are lot's of questions about the rotation so I'm just going to lump them into one. Will Buchholz remain healthy? Will Rick Porcello and Joe Kelly be able to maintain the groove they both seemed to get into at the end of last season? Will Eduardo Rodriguez be able to make the next step up in class?
5. Is there a spot for knuckleballer Steven Wright? I don't know why but I have a soft spot for him. Will he be the long-reliever / spot starter or will be catch on with some team as a 5th starter? I hope he catches a break somewhere. Doesn't even have to be with Boston.

Player Comparison

Here's a player comparison I've been wondering about lately:

Player A - 7 HR/ 24 RBI/ .241 BA/ .271 OBP/ .412 SLG/ .682 OPS
Player B - 5 HR/ 17 RBI/ .244 BA/ .312 OBP/ .360 SLG/ .673 OPS

Both players man the same position but Player B is making $17 million more than Player A. If you haven't figured it out Player A is Will Middlebrooks who is starting to get hot for the Padres while Player B is Pablo Sandoval who has been pretty disappointing so far for the Red Sox.

Middlebrooks probably needed a change of scenery and I wish him all the best. It's just that this comparison has been bothering me these past few days. The fact that Middlebrooks is also 7-years younger also makes this comparison a little harder to take on a full stomach (no Panda pun intended).

Red Sox Thoughts

The Red Sox have brought in both free agents Jon Lester and Pablo Sandoval for visits. My hope is that they sign (re-sign?) Lester and let Sandoval go back to the Giants.

Lester is a workhorse and I would not have an issue with a 6-year $127-140 million deal. I see the 31-year old Lester as a left-handed Curt Schilling who was able to pitch until he was 40-years old.

Everyone remembers the heroics of Sandoval in the post-season but in the regular season he's basically just a 6-hole hitter. Brian MacPherson has a good breakdown of what Sandoval is and isn't. Don't over pay for that!

Let me also say that I wouldn't mind if Clay Buchholz was traded as part of a package for Cole Hamels or straight up for Doug Fister (I think 3-years of Buchholz at $38.5 million total is a good value for the free agent to be Fister).

So let it be written - so let it be done!