All-Star Game Thoughts

I'll do some live-blogging as I'm staying in tonight to watch the game.

8:00 - Is it just me or does Kevin Kennedy and Jeannie Zelasko have a Nick and Jessica thing going on?

8:19 - Introductions. I'm glad to see Morgan Ensberg on the team but when did he get added? How did I miss that? (Oh he replaced Scott Rolen - well that rights that wrong I guess.) In case you are wondering the A's guy is Justin Duchscherer who has a 4-1 record with a 1.49 ERA and 4 saves. I think Mark Kotsay or Hudson Street would have been better choices. I know Tampa Bay ownership is cheap but you' think at least they would buy their players uniforms you couldn't see through. You can read the "Tampa Bay" right on Danys Baez's T-shirt through his white uniform shirt. How psyched was Shea Hillenbrand to be introduced after Kenny Rogers? Hey - what nobody brought Jorge Posada's kid out this year?

8:30 Somebody yells Hail Britania after a moment of silence and then they play the national anthem of England. Very classy move by MLB.

8:40 While I'm watching the game, while I'm writing these entries - I'm also playing in a $7,500 guaranteed poker tournament on-line. There were 545 players and the top prize is $1,875.

8:44 I'm not sure who I despise more - Scooter or Tim McCarver.

9:02 I really hope that Al Leiter retires and takes Tim McCarver's announcing job next year. I also think ESPN would do the world a favor by replacing Joe Morgan with Jerry Remy or Dennis Eckersly. Joe Morgan and Tim McCarver are why the terrorists hate us. Mike Piazza steps to the plate and a little voice in my head flashes back to seeing The Fantastic 4 by saying "flame on!"

9:08 I wonder if Ameriquest Mortgage realizes that the song they feature from the Rolling Stones includes the lyrics "you make a dead man cum"?

9:10 Tejada takes John Smoltz yard. I bet that made Donald from Georgia real happy.

9:18 Is it just me or does Bartolo Colon look a little like a young Fred G. Sanford? BTW - in case you were wondering - the AL was favored -$129 to +$119 (meaning you would have to risk $129 to win $100 on the AL vs. risking just $100 to win $119 on the NL). The over / under for runs is 9.5 which seems low for an all-star game.

9:24 I don't know why but the drugfree.org commercial on steroids suddenly reminded me of Jason Giambi's huge contract with the Yankees. What is it that steroids do to you again? Damon leads off with a nubber single, A-Rod walks and Ortiz hits the longest, hardest-hit single in the history of the all-star game. Damon scores - 2-0 AL. Manny K's. Yuk. Tejada drives in his second run with a force out. He's now the front-runner for game MVP.

9:42 OK I just busted out of my poker tournament. I was the small blind with 8c, 9c. The button raised twice the big blind and I called because the guy had been stealing blinds all night. The flop comes Kc, Jc, 7c. We both check. The turn is a blank so I bet all-in (I know - big mistake) and he calls with the Ac, 4c. River is another blank (I needed 10c for a straight flush). His flush beats my flush and I finish 248th and out of the money by far. I'm all-done with poker for the night. Fiddle-dee-dee.

9:49 So do they throw out that guy who grabbed the ball Roberts hit? Fan interference gets you kicked out - right? I mean - this time it counts right? I bet he's still there in his puke green shirt (because its really an exhibition). Ortiz hits a foul down the first base line and puke green shirt guy is still there. That's what I thought.

10:13 OK I'll say it! This is a very boring game.

10:15 My buddy calls Tim McCarver a "no good cockknocker". Not quite sure what that means but it seems to fit. Did McCarver just say the Moistest Alou was voted to the all-star game? Wasn't he a managers choice because San Fran needed a rep? McCarver you stupid cockknocker.

10:26 Teixeira just hit a 2-run HR to make it 7-0 AL. Teixeira was originally drafted by the Red Sox but the old management was too cheap to sign him. I think the only people really into watching this game right now are the people sweating the over / under. Let's see what else in on.

10:35 Kenny Rogers comes into the game greeted by a solid wall of boos. McCarver feels the fans' boos have softened. People still despise Rogers its just that this boring game has lulled the fans at the game into some sort of zombie trance. OK Rogers gives up a 2-run HR to Andruw Jones. The people with the under hate Rogers even more while the people with the over have "softened" their stance on Rogers.

10:43 Did MLB get the black version of Up With People to sing God Bless America? Ronin is on USA. This is an under-rated movie with a top-notch cast. DeNiro, Jean Reno, Stellan Skarsgard, Sean Bean, and Jonathan Pryce.

10:48 Kevin Kennedy interviews Kenny Rogers and I'm torn over who is the bigger jackass.

10:53 The car chase in Ronin has to be one of the best ever filmed. Jean Reno is going to be in the upcoming film version of The DaVinci Code. He'll play Bezu Fache who is the French detective knicknamed "the bull" if I recall correctly. Tom Hanks will play Robert Langdon. Not sure about you but Hanks is probably the last person I pictured when I read this book or Angels and Demons.

11:00 My TV guide says this game should be over by now (well maybe if Fox didn't have a 45 minute pregame). Is the crowd at the game dead or what? I don't think I've ever heard so many people be so quiet. Let me also take this opportunity to say that Walter Matthau was a giant and this new Bad News Bears is just pissing on his grave.

11:10 Chad Cordero comes into the game and I can't help but notice that he really has a block head. Seriously. Its like a cinder block with a hat.

11:16 Bob Wickman is in to pitch the 9th for the AL. I predicted that he'd give up a HR if he got into the game. Let's see how I do on my prediction.

11:22 Wickman walks Jones and is gone. BJ Ryan comes in and during the break it pours. It wasn't rain though - it was Walter Matthau pissing on Fox from heaven for showing so many commercials for the new Bad News Bears. BJ gives up a hit to Gonzo but then gets a ground out. Mariano "Fruit Bat" Rivera comes in to get the last out. Ensberg strikes out and Rivera secures home field advantage for the Red Sox (oh did I say that out loud?).

Good night.